Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
