Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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