I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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