That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
