I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
