Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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