doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
