just tell him i said nine months
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
