I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize
