3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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