your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
we're so committed to being not committed
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
