i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
