For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
