Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
