Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
