Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Let's get the cat blown out
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
