The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
