i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize