would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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