Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
