some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize