You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Randomize
