Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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