Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
