Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize