piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
