I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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