I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
