ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
