At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize