I just saw a hot homeless man
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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