she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
