i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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