If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
