I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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