He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I need to align my fucking chakras
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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