dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
