He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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