We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
