if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize