is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
