A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
