Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Panties = found
Randomize
