I want to stick my p in your. b.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
