Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
