Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
