i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
