Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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