so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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