is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
