ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
