Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
